Without you…

Without you I’m lost.
Without you, I’m missing a piece of my heart.
Without you, I’m missing a part of my smile.
Without you, I’m missing you.

That’s how much I’m missing you and loving you all the time.
I want you, need you and I LOVE YOU!
Because when I’m with you, loving YOU is enough for ME.

When I think of you.

When I think of you, I smile and I cry,
knowing that i have been missing you for a while.
Feeling silly and giddy with a hundred thousand butterflies took a lofty flight.

Falling, tumbling through the air, with brilliant colors everywhere.
Lisping, smiling, wisps of golden hair.

Saying goodbye is the hardest,
Choosing to do it is like jumping off a ledge.
Letting it all go and move forward.
Maybe there will be something spectacular underneath.

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On A Different Light

Often times when we try to seek the truth or answers to the questions in our heads. During this time we tend to ignore our feelings and of the people we love. Most of the time, we unknowingly push them farther away from us, instead of pulling them in.

When we care so much for the people we love, we sometimes loose ourselves in the process. Losing oneself does not mean we are out of our wits and sanity. It’s just that we tend to care more of what our loved ones feelings that we forget to care for ourselves. The shift in our behavior has a big effect with each other. And most of the time, the reason that made them love us seemed to dim. Change has changed us for the worse instead of being inspired to be a better version of ourselves. We ignore our own individuality and growth because we want to make things work.

We may not have noticed these changes in ourselves because we are trying so hard to make everything right for each other.

I became a weirder version of myself. I bacame needy and clingy and when I noticed these changes in me I know in my heart that something does not seem right but can’t figure it out. I know that there is something missing but could not find it within me.

Sometimes we need to give each other space in order for that special bond to grow. Space creates growth and makes us realize that we have abandoned ourselves to please the people we love. When you let yourself down, it’s easy to mess up on Love and it hinders our loved ones “see the real you”.

Wanting to take care of ourselves does not mean we do not care for our loved one’s feelings or want to leave them behind. We sometimes need to be alone to regroup our thoughts, heal our hearts and see things on a different light.

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endings are new beginnings

Sometimes it takes a really big fall to know hiw strong we really are. Endings, may it be good or bad, it will always affect us. It is on how we cope and bounce back from it really matters. I’m not saying that you won’t feel sadness and hurt but it’s on how we accept what has happened.

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People can come and go into our lives, there are times that we also need to leave the people that we love for our own sake. It is not selfish to give yourself time to heal, mend and recuperate because it would be harder for the people you love if you feel that you have lost yourself in the process of loving them too much. It’s the hardest decision to make because you might loose the person that you love and what’s worst is you leave a part of you behind… your heart.

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Accepting that he has moved on without you is the worst feeling ever. But you have to also move forward and accept it. It’s a heartbreaking experience I could never wish anyone. Sometimes you want to regret that decision of leaving and want to go back but there’s no turning back or undo button. You just need to be strong and lift up all your worries and fears to God.

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I’m not saying that you will
not anymore feel any hurt, sadness or fears but having faith that God is with you all throughout your journey in life. It’s better to live your present and leave your past but keeping all the lessons that you learned and have hope for the unknown future.

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In my journey, I sometimes falter to thank God for all the blessings he has given me but never have I felt tht he has ceased loving me even at my most difficult times. There are parts of our lives that we feel alone but during those times, we are not alone but he is always there guiding us back to him. He is waiting for us to let him take charge of our lives.

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I’m not sure what the future holds for me. I am sometimes impatient and wants to know every reason for everything that has happened in my life but sometimes there are things that we cannot control because God is in charge of our lives. Waiting is hard but being patient is even harder but I have faith that it will be worth it.

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My new beginning is now in God’s guidance. I may still make mistakes and may take another path but I know that whatever happens I am not alone taking this journey. And I am still hoping and praying that the people I lost along the way, will be part of my new beginning.

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Don’t want to say good bye

I was taken by you immediately. Too shy to speak for so long and neither one of us want to give in.

We’ve been through good times, and some really bad times and I struggle now with the change. Have I changed you? Or have you/we grown up? Do I restrict the person you are?

I am scared and unwilling for so many reasons. If I go, I’ll lose me…and possibly the ‘you’ I know….
If I don’t, I’ll lose you completely…

Life without you? The thought is unbearable. But life without me…will be unbearable for us both.
I feel like I’m screaming into a vaccum….

Do you love me? I do love you, really I do, more than myself sometimes….
but sometimes you make me feel like a stranger, rather than someone who means as much as anything else in your life. Your family, your friends, travel… You seem to be able to stand up and fight for everything but me. So I feel isolated and confused.

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It seems yet again I’ve been kidding myself. Living with the belief things are a certain way when they are far from it…completely deluded. And might just be wishful thinking that you’ll see me as me.

I love you, and I know I’m going to lose you soon….and I miss you already….

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Some things can’t be rushed

One thing I learned in life…
You lose your own importance in someone’s life when you give them more than they deserve.

How can one say that you have given someone more than they deserve?
How can you stop your heart from loving the same person although you’re apart from each other?

Sometimes what’s best for us isn’t what we wanted.
Leaving is always never easy and it’s the most painful thing to do.
How many times I have tried to talk myself out of it but sometimes you just need to do it.

Sometimes it’s hard to choose if you should wait or let someone know that you still love them.
Sometimes you’re too scared to be rejected again or worse be ignored.

And you choose to wait even if you’re not sure on what to expect.
Hoping that day would come and you’re both ready to re-visit the past, this time with with an open heart.
And it will make your bond stronger than before.

Between friendship and relationships there’s always a big part that keeps both ends meet, LOVE.
and you’ll just realize some things can’t be rushed.

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Starting over on a clean canvas


Don’t wait till tomorrow to start over. Start right now with a clean canvas, every second is a new opportunity to change something.

Beneath the full moon, the stars and on what might have been… I have found what I was looking for, hidden to me by my fears and expectations because I was afraid to loose my balance.. Myself.

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Sometimes we have to push our boundaries beyond what we are used to. We may be too complacent on what we already have and might have ignored new opportunities. It does not mean changing what you already have but trying to discover new thngs within yourself and you’ll might be surprised what you’ll find out.

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It’s always a good thing to be driven by goals that you have planned almost half of your life. But it’s also good to try new things spontaneously without giving it another thought or listening to your fears.

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I now know that whatever challenges and problems that I will encounter in the future. I will face it with a happy heart, stronger and more resilient but always be modest and appreciate the people who helped me to where I am now.

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